You may know the line-up: 
 

• Breakfast – Not worth the mention though as the two presenters employed never seem to be on the show and I never see the same stand in twice so why waste my breath – it’s a crap show anyway

• Morning Politics – Lloyd Piggott- Smyth (shame about the stammering, he really should lay off the booze)

• Literary Luvvie at Lunchtime – Brigitte Atwell (pronounced Bri-geeeeeet!) and not forgetting her pretentious producer, who I wish to leave unnamed…(who could organise a piss-up at a brewery but would so stress everyone out that the whole reason for the occasion would be destroyed; unfortunately he’s taken his talents to daytime television and is destroying their day instead)

• Irish Aggravation in the afternoon – Tony Flags (until even the boss got fed up with him and he got the sack)

• The Queen of Drivetime – Jeremy Baskerville – watch your backs boys!

• Late Night Banter – with the ageing Jake Marshall…. I could rant for hours but that’s for another day….

• Not forgetting the overnight crew – Jez, Fez and Bez…. Watch-it, cool-it, we’re bitchin man! Funnily enough they’ll be stuck on overnights for the foreseeable future…..

Dodging my hormonal flatmate (now thankfully married off), obsessing over in-the closet friends, catching out-of-the closet friends, flooring a back stabbing bitch (Sharon – more on her later) and shouldering all my friends love crisis’; it doesn’t sound as though I have time for a love life does it? 
 
Well I’ve had my fun with a sexy Spanish stripper; an agonising ‘is it on?’ or ‘is it off?’ affair with one of the aforementioned presenters (abruptly halted by fat talentless bitch…as above again, she must be bloody good at blow jobs that’s all I can say!) and now I’m in a quandary as to whether to date an old college sweetheart or try again with said Spanish stripper….  

But above all I have the low down on what REALLY goes on behind the scenes of a well-known talk radio station. 

 So enough of my warblings! You want the salacious behind the scenes gossip of Chat FM don’t you? 

Well let me tell you there’s enough juice to make a few pairs of ears burn; starting with Jake Marshall and Tony Flags! I’ve been ‘fortunate’ enough (shall we say) to produce them both so which one urinated on air and which one promised to show me whether he was circumcised or not? 

Now then, I also fancy being your agony aunt – so if you have any SEXUAL problems don’t hesitate to write to me; after all I’m only an email away:  [email protected]  

According to Erma Kurtz (Cosmo agony aunt) you’ve got to be nosy, bossy and not too pure! She’s absolutely right of course… who wants advice from an Angel?! (NB Angel by name but not necessarily by nature!) 

So my darlings, until the next instalment of my memoirs of Chat FM! 

Love n’ hugs 

angel